Monday, June 26, 2017

No Ugly Dogs

Congratulations to Martha, the Neapolitan Mastiff that was named Ugliest Dog of 2017.  The contest is held yearly at a fair in California.  Of course, there are no igly dogs.  It is one of those ironic names the humans like to bestow on other humans and pets.  My first name, Demon is ironic because I am a good boy.  On the other paw, so is Angel:s name.  Since she reads my blog, that is all I am going to say about ANGEL.

My town celebrated the annual Balloonfest this weekend.  It does look nice when all the hot air  balloons are released. There are other activities to do on the grounds.  I stayed home with humom who can't go to events like that.  My brother, Jeff went, and he had a good time.  That makes me think of the people who say, a good time was had by all.  This  is never true unless it is a small group of humans.  I don't care how much fun an event can be for its guests, there will always be that one human who will never have a good time. Those are the humans who have dedicated their lives to the pursuit of depression.  Humans are an odd group.

My neck is better.  Thank you for all your prayers and positive energy.

Demon Flash Bandit

Friday, June 23, 2017

Movie Review and Bacon

When you enter a theater, the aroma of popcorn permeates the air.  Even the humans with their inferior odor receptors (they call them noses) can smell the popcorn.  Many  theaters no longer draw the crowds that they once enjoyed. To be realistic, the potential theater audience has dwindled  due to the wide amount of choices of entertainment enjoyed by the modern audience.  In order for the theaters to keep their doors open, I can offer a way to bring in the crowds once again. The answer is as plain as thr semi useless nose on the human:s face.  The concession stand should sell bacon.  The smell of bacon is the sweetest smell in dogdom.  Even the humans like to smell it.  Imagine sitting and watching a movie while eating bacon?  The theater would be packed.  I have decided to do a movie review on an older movie that humom watched recently
This is an unlikely love story between a rich socialite and a poor carpenter with 4 "active" sons and a dog.    In the beginning the socialite  was even more of a diva than Angel Zoom Smokey.  In fact, most people like Angel Zoom Smokey.  No one really liked the socialite  If you are in the mood to watch a light hearted love story, this is a good choice.

Demon Flash Bandit

Thursday, June 22, 2017

Dogtor Visit

Yesterday I went to the dogtor.  I have an infection on my neck.  She gave me medicine, and I should be okay soon.  I also
 have a lump that could be a cyst or a tumor.  I will go back in a month so the dogtor can see if it changes size.  I would appreciate the prayers and positive energy from my readers.  I am tired so I will get back to my regular  informative blogs tomorrow.

Demon Flash Bandit

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Worm Monster

Yesterday I went outside for my walky and I bad barely got out of the house when I saw a monster worm coiled up next to the porch.  He was wearing a fancy outfit and I immediately didn't like him. He had an arrogant aura surrounding him.  I didn't try to smell him up close, but  he had the faint smell of mouse  on his breath.  How dare he come into my territory and eat a mouse. How will humom get her wireless  computer mouse if he is eating them?  When I got back from my walky, I told humom about the giant worm monster.  She said it isn't a giant worm.  It is a snake. She   doesn't like snakes although she thinks the one I saw is nonpoisonous. It is still a good idea to avoid getting close to it.  Angel Zoom Smokey saw it and refused to continue her walky.  The snake offered me an apple, but I declined his offer.  The snake can fool the humans, but dogs aren't fooled easily.

Demon Flash Bandit

Sunday, June 18, 2017

Take a Bite Out of Crime

Many of my readers will recognize McGruff, the crime dog.  He was a dog who campaigned about crime prevention.  He gave instructions on ways to be safer.  The police knew that people listen to dogs because dogs are awesome.  He was in ads and commercials.  He reminded the humans to lock their doors.  I know it is a simple thing, but some humans would leave their doors unlocked.  I like McGruff as do my humsns.  He was s handsome dog, and with his hat and coat  was irresistible to the bitches.  When he travelled, he had to have a decoy to throw   them off course when he was going to kennel  hotel to relax.

Ironically, McGtuff was arrested in 2011 and is presently doing a 16 year stretch in a Texas jail.  Of course it wasn't really McGruff because it was an actor dressed as McGruff.    One measure of celebrity popularity is to have humans imitating you.  I have the same problem which1 I solve with my stunt dog, Phantom Fast Snowman. My lifestyle is not the subject so back to McGruff.  He was brought to justice by a police dog at a routine traffic stop. The authorities got a warrant to search his place.  They found 1000 marijuana plants, 22 weapons, a grenade launcher,and a lot of ammunition.  Perhaps he was planning to fight his own war against crime.  Then I remembered that this was Texas so it was a normal amount of weapons.  I think the reason he is in jail is because it is against the law to impersonate a dog without permission from the Council of dogs.  Remember:  Take a bite out of crime.

Demon Flash Bandit

Wireless Micet

My humom bought a new desk top computer.  Her laptop died, and William talked her into getting a desk top. He hooked it up to the television to create a media center.  Now humom needs to get a wireless keyboard and mouse.  Humom can't get around good so she can't use the wired one that came with the computer. My humans just throw the money away.  I can't believe they would spend money on a wireless mouse when I have seen wireless mice running around outside.  In my continuing mission to help my humans, I went outside to find a mouse. The mice must have been warned because I couldn't smell any in the yard so I  asked some chipmunks, but I couldn't use any torture to get them to sing about the mice. Besides. I got sidetracked listening to them sing They are almost as good as Alvin and the Chipmunks.  By the wsy  Alvin is also a chipmumk.  After the musical interlude, it was time to go back inside. Next time I go out, I am going to ask the beavers.  I don't ask the squirrels becaise they ate forgetful.  They can never remember where they put their scorns.  I wonder how they have survived as a species  Forgetting is not goof for survival.

Demon Flash Bandit

Wednesday, June 14, 2017

I Miss Dogster

Dogster was a great site for dogs and their humans.   I met many of my followers on that site. It was only for dogs.  We had our own pawmail and we  wrote our diaries and made friends.  I was often  chosen as a diary pick of the day.  This was before Facebook.  I joined the group when I was a wee puppy.  Angel joined it too when humom brought her   home.  When FB was invented, the humans started getting on it and they took  up  their dogs computer time.  Dogster magazine bought the site and didn't want a dogs input. Many humans go on FB, and I am going to share some fB entries.  The names have been changed to protect the boring.

Jill: I slept late today.
David:  I am at work?
Cynthia: I see a bird.
Forward:  shared by Mary: Old  people have lived a long time.  If you don't share this, you will go to FB jail.
Lynn:  I am at the store.  I can't decide whether to buy lage or xl. Eggs.
Lucy:  buy the xlarge.  I got 2 dozen  yesterday.
John: zMy pencil broke
Sally:  I am at the  Walmart. 🍉
Debbie;   love watching the grandchildren. The little darlings just broke a window
July: .  💡
Vera:  I am getting  guzzied up to go to church.
Betty;  Chicken gizzatds are 30c cents a pound at Piggly Wiggly?

  • Humans are boring.  

Demon Flash Bandit.